


No use in pretending, no use in saving face. My love is never ending, you are my saving grace - a series of season six vignettes

by Poutini



Series: The sequence and series of events [3]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Anal Sex, Fantasy, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Patrick needs a cold shower, Probably actual sexual content too, Romance, Suction cup dildo usage, Will write porn for poutine, drunken sleep talking, kink discussion and an updating of the spreadsheet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:01:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24204829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Poutini/pseuds/Poutini
Summary: A series of tenveryshort vignettes highlighting conversations, or other situations, we never saw on-screen during season six.FollowsHold me now, it's hard for me to say I'm sorry - a series of season five vignetteswhich followsLike a virgin - a series of season four vignettes.Title is from Ben Harper'sBy My Side.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Series: The sequence and series of events [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1850773
Comments: 85
Kudos: 230





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Here we are again  
> Season six, but make it short  
> Two hundred or less
> 
> words that is
> 
> with apologies to my high school English teacher(s), who probably would have predicted my bastardization of the haiku form, but not likely my penchant for writing perfunctory pornography, nor my affection for alliteration.

Patrick was nearly asleep when he felt the press of David’s lips and gentle suction first on the inside of his wrist, then on his clavicle, and on the base of his ribcage. He hissed as David pressed on the purple mark blooming on his bottom rib.

“ _Mmmm_ David - what are you doing?”

David returned to Patrick’s wrist. “I’m making it beautiful, like you said.” 

Back to the clavicle. “Making this beautiful, too.” 


	2. Two

“Patrick, it’s _fine_. I appreciate you telling me.”

“David, your face says otherwise.”

“ _Listen_ , this isn’t the first time something like this has happened, and knowing my mother and sister, it’s unlikely to be the last, so just let me handle it.”

“Ok, but when you say ‘ _handle it_ ’, what exactly do you mean?”

“Honey, _shhhhh_. This conversation never happened.”


	3. Three

Patrick’s fingers danced along David’s shoulders, and his voice dropped half an octave. “I really like seeing you in my clothes, David.” One hand dropped down, fingers hooking into the braided belt to tug David closer. 

“ _Mmm!_ Well. Stevie said I look like a youth pastor.”

Patrick’s hands stilled, his eyes narrowed as he looked David up and down. He didn’t  _ not _ look like a youth pastor, and well, fuck, now pawing at him felt weird. “Alright. That’s the end of that. Go get changed, David.”


	4. Four

“Ok, but Patrick, you realize that it is an  _ actual _ kink, with its own vernacular and  _ very popular  _ PornHub tag?”

“No, I didn’t know...but...how do  _ you _ know? Are you into... _ that? _ ”

_ Scoff.  _ “Um,  _ no _ . I am not into  _ anything _ that produces offspring, real  _ or _ imagined. But I did do a stint as a copywriter for an amateur porn start up - “

“Okay, David, I’ll update the spreadsheet.”


	5. Five

Back and forth, between fantasy and reality. 

Between the best approximation of what could have been, and the  _ stunning _ detail of what actually was. 

If Patrick closed his eyes, he could imagine that David was driving himself back against Jake’s cock, while he simultaneously worked magic with his mouth on Patrick’s.

If he opened his eyes, David was a _vision_ \- eyes rolled back as he took what he needed from the dildo suction cupped to the wall, cheeks hollowed and tongue making quick work on Patrick’s cock. 

_ No contest.  _


	6. Six

Predictably, adorably, David fell asleep soon after Patrick’s car hit the highway, just a few short turns off gravel roads and provincial trunk roads away from the winery.

Once he was safely able to engage cruise control, he reached over to take David’s hand in his own. David shifted in his seat, turning to face Patrick, but still fully asleep. Under normal, sober, conditions, David was a bit of a sleep-talker, but holy hell, when he was under the influence, he had a tendency to spill a lot of beans. 

_ “...s’gonna slick you up reaaaaal nice…” _

_ “...pull...pull harder...nooooo...haaaaaarder….” _

_ “...mmmmPatrick....more...I can take more….” _

Patrick had to adjust himself carefully, while maintaining focus on the wheel.

_ “Mmm! Spicy!...Imma lick it…” _

David’s sexy soliloquy continued, as the pressure in Patrick’s pants increased, throughout the entire drive back to the motel. Patrick helped a very sleepy, cuddly, and blissfully unaware of the carnage he had been causing with his words, David into the motel room, depositing him on the bed before locking the door and stepping into a _very cold_ shower. 


	7. Seven

Patrick couldn’t but laugh as David came back to bed, eyes soft and sex-drunk, limbs moving slowly and slightly uncoordinated, yet still wearing his “I’m stupid” t-shirt, pink tiara...and nothing else. 


	8. Eight

Back and forth, between fantasy and reality. Between the memories of horizons filled with tall buildings and historic statues burned into his memory, and the lush detail of what actually was. 

If David closed his eyes, he could imagine that he was straddling Patrick on a plush sofa, facing out towards the magnificent New York skyline at dusk. 

If he opened his eyes, Patrick was a vision - eyes dark, hair tousled, lips swollen from kisses, his hands gripping each side of David’s flank, helping to maintain the driving rhythm they both enjoyed - and the evening sun was catching on the leaves of the elm trees outside, reflecting innumerable shades of green. 

_Incomparable_ to New York. 

_Here_ meant warmth, rather than the cool shades of industrial grey. 

A soundtrack of nature, rather than traffic. 

Home, rather than...a life better left behind. 

_ Fuck.  _ He needed to fix this. 


	9. Nine

David is curled tight into Patrick’s side, his head tucked under Patrick’s chin. Patrick’s fingers card mindlessly through David’s mussed hair, while David traces patterns on Patrick’s bare chest. The blue handkerchief, employed for the second time today, and damp with perspiration, lies next to Patrick’s head on the pillow.

“So, David, how did you manage to convince them to accept a home inspection condition?”

David lifted his head, looking at Patrick quizzically. “I’m sorry?”

“The offer. It’s a seller’s market. How did you convince them to accept a conditional offer?”

David bit his bottom lip. “Um. Well, I told them how we met.”

“And the inclusion of the appliances?”

“I told them about the first time you sang to me.”

“And the roof repair before closing?”

“Um, I told them how you proposed.”

“And the possession date on a long weekend?”

“I promised them wedding photos.”

Patrick couldn’t contain his laughter any longer. “ _David Rose_ , did you _romance_ your way into buying a house?”

David buried his face in Patrick’s chest, his own laughter bubbling up inside him. “ _Listen_ , I’m not the only one with a weakness for a good love story!”


	10. Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so when you notice that you're exactly 69 words shy of 1000, you make your last chapter 69 words. It's the law.
> 
> Thanks for reading! All comments and kudos are much appreciated.

They watched Johnny and Moira’s SUV until it was out of sight. Final group hugs, and a gathering of garment bags, and David and Patrick were off to finally catch a few hours rest.

Walking to the car, their fingers interlaced, David couldn’t help but tease. “So, what’s the first thing you want to do as a married man?” 

Patrick’s answer sent anticipatory shivers down his spine. 

“My husband.”


End file.
